Menopause & Marriage: Why This Life Phase Is a Divorce Hotspot (and How to Beat the Odds)

The Numbers Don’t Lie

A UK survey by the Family Law Menopause Project and Newson Health found that 73% of women blamed menopause for marital breakdown, and 67% reported increased arguments or domestic abuse during menopause (HealthyWomen; Balance Menopause).

Over 60% of divorces are initiated by women in their 40s to 60s, the very age range of perimenopause and menopause (RJS Family Law).

Divorce timing lines up clearly with menopause onset (ages 45–55) (Hello Divorce).

Hormones, Lifestyle & Relationships

Menopause brings undeniable changes:

Estrogen and progesterone decline → mood swings, anxiety, sleep disruption

Pelvic and metabolic shifts → intimacy challenges, weight gain, fatigue

Brain fog & irritability → emotional disconnection

As Coach Elle Jolie of Kelowna BC often teaches through her StrongHER programs, neglecting physical health before menopause magnifies symptoms. Years without strength training, balanced nutrition, or stress regulation can leave the body unprepared—leading to frustration that too often gets projected onto the relationship.

Projection Trap: When Self-Dissatisfaction Turns Into Marital Breakdown

When women feel unhappy in their own skin, it’s easy to shift that unhappiness outward.

“If I feel unattractive, it must be you.”

“If I’m unhappy, it’s because this marriage is broken.”

But research shows that menopause tends to magnify existing cracks, not create them from scratch. Accountability matters—symptoms are real, but how we prepare for and navigate them makes the difference.

Grey Divorce & The Bigger Picture

The rise of "grey divorce"—couples separating after 50—is tied not just to hormones, but to empty nesting, shifting priorities, and financial independence (Verywell Mind).

Yet studies show that divorce post-menopause can sometimes trigger positive lifestyle changes, such as better diet and increased activity (PubMed).

Menopause Can Strengthen Marriage

As Elle Jolie coaches women in her StrongHER Club, this stage doesn’t have to be a breaking point—it can be a launching point when approached with responsibility and support.

What works:

Learn how to strength train with a highly accredited coach 2–4x/week to protect muscle, metabolism, and bone health

Protein-rich nutrition & stress management to stabilize hormones naturally

Open communication with a partner about symptoms and intimacy

Medical support like HRT when appropriate (yet underused—only a third of women are offered it despite clear benefits) (Independent)

Bottom Line

Menopause doesn’t automatically end marriages—it exposes vulnerabilities. When women delay lifestyle changes until symptoms hit, the pressure often spills into relationships. But with preparation, accountability, and teamwork, menopause can transform a partnership instead of ending it.

At Elle Jolie Wellness in Kelowna BC, StrongHER founder and menopause fitness specialist Coach Elle Jolie helps women rewrite this narrative: building strength, confidence, and resilience so midlife becomes a turning point, not a breaking point.